Lake George for the Non-Campers Among Us

Posted August 14, 2009 by Nicki Krawczyk

Lake-george My people are not, by definition, “camping people”. My family does not own lanterns or camp stoves and I don’t think I’ve gotten up close and personal with a sleeping bag since I was eleven. This is not to say that I don’t enjoy camping, but if you’re taking me to the woods for two weeks and my only diversion will be to gut fish, I can’t guarantee I won’t lose my proverbial marbles and gut you. (Fair warning.)

Since extended jail time would seriously affect my hair coloring schedule (and convicts with roots are often the first to be shivved), I like to research potential camping grounds ahead of time to ensure I’ll have something to do.

Therefore, today’s research looks in the direction of lovely Lake George in New York. Featured on the Today Show in July and now being frequently mentioned by my friends as a potential late-summer destination, Lake George may just have to contend with me soon. And so, without further ado, Stuff to Do in Lake George to Keep Oneself Out of Prison:

Balloon Rides: Okay, I have always wanted to take a balloon ride. I like the idea of floating through the air in the kind of eye-catching vehicle that affords beautiful views and attracts all kinds of attention (and not the bad kind of attention — I’m talking about you, Segways.) It looks like there are even a couple of different companies to choose from. Can I bring lunch? Can I “accidentally” drop chicken salad on people below? We shall see …

Fort Ticonderoga: Answer honestly: When’s the last time you saw a musket demonstration? What? You’ve never seen one? Oh, for shame. Luckily, you can remedy the situation at Fort Ticonderoga, former stronghold of both French and British forces, while rocking out with a Fife and Drums Corps, to boot. Also, you can buy a three-corner hat in the gift shop. Sold!

Tubing: For adrenaline-pumping, blood-curdling, push-yourself-to-the-limit action … you’re reading the wrong post. This is a vacation, people. I want to lie on my back in the sun and gently sway and bob as I drift down a river. I mean, I want to do that while I’m not on vacation, too, but the opportunity doesn’t present itself nearly as often.

Dr. Morbid’s Haunted House: This summer has totally tanked temperature-wise in the Northeast, but I’m still holding out hope. And, should the temperature soar, it looks like it might be worth trying to beat the heat with chills from this goofy attraction. I mean, teenagers dressed as zombies jumping out from around corners isn’t scary, per se, but it sure can be fun. (Whereas zombies dressed as teenagers is frightening and/or comprises the majority of the audience at a Miley Cyrus concert.)

Goony Golf: So miniature golf is, you know, pretty standard and I normally wouldn’t bother to mention it here, except that Goony Golf touts itself as offering “some of the most outrageous and spectacular miniature golfing adventures ever concocted by man.” That is a bold statement just begging to be evaluated.

The North Pole: Okay, I think this one is kind of … weird. But fun! If your cup of good cheer is perpetually on the verge of boiling over, pop in to the North Pole (Home of Santa’s Workshop) and sooth that urge. Right smack dab in the middle of summer, feel free to get down with your merry self at the Reindeer Barn, the Talking Christmas Tree (it says, “What are you doing talking to a Christmas Tree? It’s August!” Kidding.), or even in the home of the jolly big guy, himself. Plus, there’s kind of an implicit guarantee that all the gift shop items were built by elves. And just try finding that in Lake Winnipesaukee.

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